I'm not a fan of those magnetic ribbons that people put on their cars. I mean what are they supposed to convey? Some deep allegiance with a cause or group? Hardly!! True support of a cause would be shown by actually affixing a PERMANENT marking of some kind. How seriously should we take an easily removable statement. There is something to be said for the permanence of a nice, sticky, mess-up-your-paintjob-if-you-ever-try-to-take-it-off, old fashioned bumper sticker. Further adding to my agita is the fact that there seems to be no consistency among magnetic statement manufacturers. Some have words, some don't. Some ribbons that appear to support the same cause, can look totally different. It drives me crazy. No seriously, I can't STAND the magnetic ribbon craze.
Moving on...I ran into a buzz saw in my dart league this week. He was a very talented player, but, and I'm probably going to sound like a real ass here, he sucked at life pretty bad. As such, I figured it was good for him to have his one thing that he was good at. Before you judge me, let me share with you the verbal exchange that led to my "he sucked at life" conclusion. In the dialogue below, I will be represented by an M for me, and he will be represented by a T for tool.
Our scene opens with the two of us waiting for drinks at the bar, which has a clear view of the Red Sox game on the TV.
T (as he steps in front of M): Oh sorry, were you waiting?
M: Yeah.
T(to the bartender): He was here first.
M: Thanks, I'll take a pitcher of Sam Adams.
T: I can't wait for the Patriots game this weekend.
M (looking at the TV): Not a baseball fan?
T: No. Football, all football. Ya see, I used to play quarterback in high school.
M: Oh, really?
T: Yeah, I played in junior high, and then I played my first year in high school. I got kicked off the team when they caught me smoking.
M: Hmmm, what are ya gonna do, right?
T: Yeah.
Now that I've made an effort to provide a reasonable recreation of the conversation, I'd like to fill in some of the thoughts that were going through my head while this was happening. First off, I'd like to say that he was nice enough to let the bartender know that I had been waiting before him, very cool. He gets weird on me, though, by throwing out the unsolicited comment about the Patriots game. I figure, ok, he's not a baseball fan, and he just wants to talk a little shop about his sport of choice. No harm there. Then he throws out this nonsense about playing quarterback in high school probably thinking he would impress me. Being who I am, a 25 year old engineer who played soccer in high school, I was utterly unimpressed by this ~35 year old man talking about the glory days. What the hell was that? Did he expect me to offer him my lunch money and do his homework for him? Uncle Rico anyone? Ok, so I'm already thinking this guy is a little off when he gives me his football bio. So let me get this straight, essentially, you played Pop Warner and you played a year on the Freshman team, right? I think that's great, but it can hardly be summed up as having "played quarterback in high school". The smoking thing cracked me up, too. Now, I have to admit, I'm being a little tough on this guy, but he was very arrogant during out dart game, and, as such, I think he's earned this commentary. I hope everyone has a great weekend.